CHRIS MARTIN HAS BLOWN OFF GWYNETH PALTROW! What an idiot. I ask you. I confess that – until I picked up the latest issue of US magazine (also a first), I did not know this. Or – to my shame – who Chris Martin actually was. I rushed home and downloaded a chunk of his music and, be fair, he’s terrific. Great music.
But leaving Gwyneth Paltrow!!?? The great actress of the age. Shakespeare in Love! How amazing does it get? And this Tin Pan Alley, penny-a-liner leaves her? After ten short years? WHO would leave Gwyneth, even after a thousand years, if they had the chance to stay?
The explanation, in US, is both sad and sobering . And a warning to all of us who try to lead a borderline decent life.
She bullied him. She called him “a moron”. All the time. Because he ate Cheetos. And let the kids have Cokes. Obviously Gwyneth – whom I adore – was right and Chris was in fact a moron. What was she thinking, the dear girl, when she went off with him, after a rock concert. But there is a lesson here for those of us who have caught a tiny glimpse of the light: It goes like this: DO NOT BE A SANCTIMONIOUS FOOL, even if you are right about exercise, diet and everything else in life. It makes people grumpy. They do not become better, as you had planned. They become furious. And they plant mean pieces about you in US magazine. And you feel bad. Gwyneth Paltrow feels bad. And that is just plain wrong.
SO,… work out like a lunatic.. quit eating crap. And look a little more like Gwyneth every day. But don’t be a prick about it, It drives folks away.
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