We’re not going to go on endlessly about this but the friend who died recently…his funeral was on Monday and there are some relevant things.
It was a huge deal…1200 people, including the Mayor of New York…other known folks. But my pal was not a public figure and people only came because they liked him so much. Quite a remarkable turnout, in the circumstances. A huge out pouring of love, as they always say in such situations. But true, too.
I gave a eulogy…. I do talks all the time and am easy with it. But this one was tough.
But here’s the thing: it is a good idea, I believe, to have a formal (as well as informal) ceremony. And it is a privilege and a half to be asked to speak…because it is so darned cathartic. EVERYONE felt better for having been there. And if it is appropriate to think of the dead doing something for the living…my pal did his wife and kids and all of us a huge favor by being so widely and intensely loved. Being present at such a massive, limbic feast made us all feel and be much better.
So the advice: build those pesky networks of friends and family in this life…they will mean everything to you, in extremis. And to your family after your passing.